Introductory babblings

Somehow it seems the whole world has a blog. Except me. So, I decided to remedy this.

I think the basic concept behind it is that one of my New Year resolutions is to be more organised in my thinking, and to this end I theorised that I ought to keep a diary or journal of some kind. And, given that I'm on the internet most days, an online version seemed sensible enough. After all, how difficult can it be to create a blog of my own?

Not difficult at all, is the answer to that. I am not exactly a Luddite, nor yet am I any kind of cybergeek. More kind of somewhere in the middle. Well. I say not difficult, but now I note that there are all sorts of tabs and whatnots that I have not as yet explored. How do I know where this will end up? The answer is that I have no idea. I like that sort of journey, though.

*Turning and shooting the CD player, which had begun to play 'Magical Mystery Tour'. Not one of the Beatles' finest moments. If they ever had any.*

I find New Year's Day depressing. I could never see the hope for the fresh start and the bright new future inherent in a brand new year. All I can think of right now is how little I want to go back to work, which is kind of ridiculous when you consider that I was told at the beginning of December that I would be finishing work in the middle of January.

So. I need to look for a new job. Yet I am dreading going back to the old one. I left work on my desk, undone. I know for a fact there is at least one hearing, possibly two, that I haven't yet dictated up on and one of those was an agency for another firm out of town. I have work that needs to be done on matters and with the court and the other side by the 5th of January. That's the third day back at work - will I be able to get the client in to take the statements and get them typed, signed and sent in time? Do I have a hearing in Oldham then? I can't remember.

You may divine from this that I have a legally-oriented job. Don't blame me. I just couldn't think what to do at university and so somehow settled for law, then blindly followed my nose into the profession. I did take a year out to think about whether I wanted to or not, though. Three years post-qualification though (nearly) and I am not convinced I chose the right path. I just don't know what else to do, that's my problem.

Part of the purpose of this blog is to get my thoughts down in writing so I can see them and so consider them more purposefully. What am I drawn to? What would I like to do? What is bugging me really is that the things I think I would like to do unfortunately invariably require a further course of study, which I haven't the wherewithal to fund as I need to continue to work.

For this reason, studying to be a probation officer or a teacher both appeal to me. More studying (which I love) and I get to earn money while I train for my new qualification. I'd like to teach English as I love passing on information and I love the subject. It was what I was best at when I was at school and I think I could pass that passion for words and books and so forth on to others.

The probation officer idea I went for last year - it is last year now. I got through to the final round of interviews and scored highly enough to be selected, but sadly others scored more highly and there weren't sufficient places for everyone, so I missed out.

Failing that, my beloved would love me to work for a local authority in some sort of capacity, either legal or doing some form of administrative job. He reckons there is no finer employer, given the perks and benefits that come with working in local government. He may well be right, and again I have had a fair few interviews in that area. No joy as yet, though. I will continue to go down that road though I think, in terms of making further applications.

This is, of course, not the best time of year to be looking for a new job. I find it objectionable that I was in the same position last year as I am this year - at least this time I had six weeks' warning, rather than coming home from a weekend away to a letter telling me I had been made redundant with immediate effect and not to bother going in on Monday except to collect my personal belongings.

However, things carry on regardless, and I remind myself that I am promised a good reference by my current employers. I am also in a better position in that I have been working in my chosen field in my local area and have got my face known more than it was before. Word is out that I'm looking, and it is traditional in the early part of the year for people to start moving firms, so all is not lost. And I can type and do general officework, so I should hopefully be able to find enough temporary work to keep me going if needs be. And it may very well be.

There may be tight times ahead, but I will get through. I WILL get through.

This year I am hoping to do several things. A holiday abroad would be nice. We're saving for some new furniture - a bed in particular as ours is broken. (Stop giggling at the back, there). It may finally be the case that marriage is on the horizon, but then that man of mine hints at that practically the whole time. First of all though he has gastric bypass surgery to get through, although his fears of expiring on the table have receded a little since his emergency surgery in November 2005.

I'd also like to get back on track with my weightloss, having joined WeightWatchers in September 2005 and lost 30 pounds. I have had a terrible week over Christmas and have probably managed to pack on at least five of those lost pounds, if not more. Chocolate chip cookies as a Christmas present, a box of Belgian chocolates from a friend who didn't know about the diet and too much generalised grazing on food without giving a hoot as to what it contained. As well as a box of Elizabeth Shaw mint chocolates received on New Year's Eve which I ate most of myself. Oh dear...